In the grand scheme of things, I suppose you're "right". I would prefer this to him actually going out and cheating on me. Also, if I had to guess how often he looks/wanks, it would be in the 1-3 times/week range. Not too bad. We have a pretty good sex life. He says that this is the most sexually satisfied he's ever been in a relationship, because I am always in the mood to do it, and when the river is red so to speak, he knows it's "BJ Week". I don't consider myself to be a prude at all. I am open to different styles/positions, enjoy dirty talking and spanking, and I am open to experimenting with toys, props, role-playing, and the like. I am passionate and sexy and have never had any complaints about my sexual performance, frequency, etc. I have even offered to watch porn with my boyfriend. So if he's so satisfied with me and loves me, why does he still hide it from me? I have heard it said that it has nothing to do with the woman, or a man's love for a woman, and to a degree, I believe that, maybe about 80% if you want to quantify my belief.
Some scientists allege that the male brain is wired to seek variety. And I've read articles that suggest that males who view porn are more likely to cheat on their partners than those males who do not view porn (actually I think the latter study was irrespective of gender). I suppose that the Venn-diagram would include those males that do watch porn and those males that don't watch porn, and cheaters would overlap in the middle; in other words, I am certain that non-porn watchers and infidels are not mutually exclusive. All of the above terrifies me.
My boyfriend and I have a very honest and fair relationship. In other words, I don't do the things that would upset me if he were to do them (such as staying in contact with exes, etc) and vice versa. I have told him that if he wants a threesome with another girl, I'm game as long as he doesn't mind having a threesome with another man. Also, if he goes to a strip club and gets a lap dance, he shouldn't be surprised or angry if I'm out at a club freak dancing with a random dude. As long as he minds, he shouldn't expect me to be cool with it, right? His porn-watching habits upset me, and he knows it, yet still does it. I have expressed what hurts me about him watching porn?it is the fact that he is being sexually aroused and satisfied by (videos and images of) other women. I have told him that I wish I could come up with something that was the equivalent?myself being sexually aroused/satisfied by other men, without actually engaging in sex acts with others. I'm not into watching porn for porn's sake; when I do masturbate I do so without the aid of porn. I still can't come up with anything to balance the scales. An eye for an eye, right? At what point though does this sort of balance and fairness have a detrimental effect on a relationship, if at all?
I guess these are all just questions I'm mulling over in my mind, and I don't know what the answers are to them, if there are any. But any wisdom any of you can offer me would be MUCH appreciated.
rating: 11
Users that liked this also liked...
 For My Bug. |  Sandwich Fiction - an idea |  Sandwich Fiction #2 |  Sandwich Fiction #3 |  I think I just had sex with a grasshopper |