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Take me home? submitted 2009.03.05 03:07 AM by mayh3m viewed 278 times


Wow alright I am buzzin so I thought rather than reguratate something AWESOME I wrote I would try to be original. Anyway I am listening to "Lead Sails (And A Paper Anchor)" which I wrote a peice about on ubersite (maybe here?) that was great, and this is why.

See, if you ever listen to the song, it to me is the idea of a man struggling, hardcore. Like, he is lost out in sea and just trying to survive. If you have read WATCHMEN (WHICH I WILL REVIEW!!!) it seems like the song that the Black Freighter story deal would have. I can relate to a lot of that because it's like life asks you to give everything away that you know and at the end if you can't understand who you than what are you? Did that make sense?

Anyway, in the song, I find solace because like tomorrow (aka today at 1:30 PM) I have to go to court and possibly confront my baby's momma, a woman I once loved. But now...eh, she's just an evil person, opposite of me, and if you believe what I'm doing as good, than she must be the opposite of good, correct? So tomorrow she won't show up but I must do the "law" song and dance and show up because a child support case has come up to fish her out, a woman that has multiple warrants out and can't seem to be found. She's probably just at home, sleeping, wishing she could have what she did, same as me...but I wish it because that's my easy path, not because it's my right path...is that why she's doing it? Who knows who cares...

I'm out here alone, oh god can you save me now? See that's what the song says, and that's how I'm going to feel tomorrow downtown in the same courtroom we got married in, in the same month we got married in practically. We got married Feb. 15th, and she didn't....maybe...no...she didn't even call....Sometimes I miss her, but I think I miss what she represented...just someone that understood me...someone that was here with me.. I have no one like that now nor can I accept any other woman like that..I am hard and I can't love someone like that anymore...I love myself too much..and the problem is that I loved her more than me and she threw that away, so now any woman in my life thinks im a dick because I can't love them back..but the problem is that I can't accept their "mediocre" way because I did that once and it hurt me..It's weird


Anyway wish me luck tomorrow...There's a story in here somewhere you will have to read "Gift of the Yellow-Man" when I'm done writing it. Chapter 20 now, and that only takes us to this time in 2008 and ALOT happened..a whole video series actually, maybe I will post them here one day..

You guys get it. Antius, Tim, the rest...(Experima el oh el)...meh im just a drunk loser too afraid to face tomorrow...

sigh...I have WATCHMEN to look forward to, but im scared guys...I really am scared...I hate this, I hate this scared feeling of weakness when I am so strong....Eh, Atlus Shrugged...that makes no sense ALRIGHT I'M OUT PEACE! -2 DIE ME :P



rating: 3


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